This is my writing assessment. I have tried to independently improve my sentences. I am looking to check that they make sense. I am checking my punctuation.
I think I am good at organisation for persuasive writing, rhetorical questions and punctuation.
I still need to learn about sentence types: simple, compound and complex.
In my opinion i think music is more important than sports.
Firstly music is popular and vital because it can make you feel happy and ecstatic. Do you not want to be happy? Well I want to be happy. For an example you can’t be happy without music because without music no one could be overjoyed.
Secondly music is awesome it can make you fill with joy and it could make you feel calm . Isn’t this what everyone wants? Also it makes you feel magnificent because you can dance like crazy. You can play instruments and be in a band and then you’ll become rich and famous.
Do you want to be popular? Well I do. So learn to play an instrument and practice really hard and you could become rich and famous.
Finally music is tremendous because it can take you from feeling tragic to ecstatic just by listening to a song or instrument being played. So do you want to be happy and overjoyed ? Well I do.
So listen to music and learn to play an instrument.
Hi Shalom,
ReplyDeleteyou have some great ideas in your writing. Well done. I loved reading your work, well done on your proof-reading too. You next step is to add detail to your ideas.